1. Non-survivor privilege and silence

    Fri 13 January 2017

    While it shouldn’t be a privilege to escape abuse in this life, there are trappings of privilege for those who have been so lucky. I know it’s an odd thing to say, and it’s a realization I’ve been slowly moving toward since childhood, but it works like this:

    • Once you survive abuse or violation, you have a knowledge of the human capacity for nastiness that others around you don’t share.
    • It is your duty to keep them blissfully ignorant at the expense of your own soul.
    • When they chatter on about how disgraceful it is for a child not to be on speaking terms with his family, you are a rude asshole if you remind them that the abuse rate in the US and most countries is staggering, so maybe the child had good reason.
    • When you’re the child they’re complaining about, no one will take your side if you try to explain to them six ways from Sunday why it’s much, much better for everyone that you have no contact with your parent/family/ex-husband, or eventually give up and tell the person to mind its own business.
    • If you try to tell your friends that their latest crush shows signs of being violent or abusive, they’ll hate you. If you turn out to be right, they’ll hate you more.

    And so on, and so forth. Honestly, if I go through every example, I’ll get too depressed to finish the article. Most of them come from personal experience.

    And this - more than anything - is why I hate human beings. Because out of those of you who’ve had the good fortune not to be abused or violated in your lifetime, maybe 1 in 1,000 can be bothered to muster sympathy for those who have. Oh, if you see an abused child on Oprah you cry your heart out, sure. But I’m talking about putting the feelings of a survivor ahead of your own when they’re right there in your face.

    When they’re someone you know; someone very much like you. When you get that crumpled feeling in the gut that it’s only random chance it was them and not you, and your first instinct is to explain away why it happened to them (and could therefore never happen to you). Or deny that it happened at all. Or have the awkward sympathetic moment you find yourself trapped in, but immediately pull back to superficiality with this person you once called friend.

    When you make some ignorant comment about abuse and someone corrects you with a story from her own experience and your first instinct is to prove her wrong, maybe the “greenest” thing you could do for the environment is become part of it already. Yeah, I’m so gosh darn mean, but goddamnit, this needs to be said.

    Those of us who’ve experienced abuse, rape and other violations don’t keep it quiet because we’re ashamed. Or because it’s intensely personal. The main reason we keep it quiet is because we know how you’ll treat us if we tell you. We know you have a culturally-granted privilege to remain ignorant. To not know, and therefore not to be responsible. Not to bother. Not to think about it.

    And certainly not to do anything that might help stop or at least curtail it somewhat in the future.

    But you are responsible. If you’re not aware that statistically a certain percentage of the people you know must have experienced physical, emotional or sexual abuse at some point in their lives, you are helping the perpetrators of those crimes keep working in the shadows. Because as long as you imagine the problem doesn’t really touch anyone you know, the problem stays hidden.

    I saw on a forum the other day some people discrediting a study about rape statistics. “If this study is true,” one poster said, “then about a fourth of the women I know must have been raped at some point, and that’s just not true.” How can anyone think that because a fourth of the women he knows haven’t told him, “Oh, by the way, I’ve been raped before” they must not have been? The answer is: they can’t. They’re beating the knowledge to the punch. They’re shouting in every way they can, “You will not drag me kicking and screaming to the realization that life isn’t fair and I’m one lucky shit not to have suffered worse than I have!”

    He might as well help round up victims for abusers. He’s perpetuating the unfairness by perpetuating the silence.

    As long as you’re more concerned about your right to be in la-la land denial than someone else’s right not to go through hell, you are fighting on the abuser’s side.

    The fact that this is a privilege you are granted through the culture which dictates that abuse victims should lie rather than tell Nice People an uncomfortable truth says something odious about the culture. We are a culture of abuse. We believe strongly in the rights of the best-funded 5% to rule over the less-funded and harder-working 95%. We convince ourselves it’s only natural if certain people, defined by such superficialities as gender and skin color rather than important traits like capability or good judgment, should rule. We convince ourselves that cleaning lady who works two jobs just to make ends meet couldn’t possibly have had the cure for cancer locked in her brain behind a lack of education, so no big loss of potential there!

    It’s all part of the same thing. As soon as you decide it’s okay for some people to carry double and triple burdens so that others may carry nothing at all, you have decided abuse is pretty neat and you’re all for it. And if that’s the case, all I’m asking is that you shuck off your privilege and take responsibility for the decision you’ve made and the side you’ve taken.

    Ignorance is not “nice.” It’s not “good people.” It’s not “I was just trying to have a nice dinner party, why’d she go and bring up a thing like that when all we were doing was saying how gosh awful wonderful the person who abused her is and how much we’d all like to see him elected God.” Ignorance is the hammer in the hand of oppression.

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  2. The Identity Theft Conspiracy Breakdown

    Fri 13 January 2017

    There continues to be an upswing in the stealing of private information like credit card data and social security numbers, bank account info. Yet there are means to fight against these offenders. The easiest way to achieve this would be to prevent identity thieves from getting your info in the first location. Creating a solid identity theft protection plan should be a number one priority for all consumers.Identity is protected by these services by tracking banking trades and credit ratings, credit lines. Someone who has his identity stolen and pays for this kind of protection support will be empowered to get compensation for wages or misplaced funds. Identity theft insurance is offered by even some companies to ensure workers do not have to squander cash, time and precious attempt to get over the thievery of their advice

    Identity Theft Protection Services

    Still, other private information and stolen card numbers is disconcerting.

    “For many people, here is the very first time they are encountering it, they actually do not recognize it and they’re freaking out,” stated Eva Velasquez, Chief Executive of the Identity Theft Resource Center.

    Can it assist to spend cash, occasionally hundreds of dollars annually, for subscriptions that provide other and credit checking solutions that guarantee to guard your identity?

    Maybe. But recognize that you just’re paying for lots of what you could do yourself.

    “You-can’t make the blanket declaration that all these services are poor or maybe not worth your while,” Velasquez stated. She equates purchasing this kind of service to paying somebody to clean your automobile instead of doing it-yourself.

    However, several customer groups are lukewarm to hostile toward such solutions.

    “The Consumer Groups believe it is not a great deal,” stated Paul Stephens, manager of policy and advocacy at the Privacy Rights Clearing House, including the services have “doubtful worth.” “It is pretty pricey, and there are several other ways that you can shield yourself.”

    After the Prospective infraction, Buyer Reviews was unequivocal on its web site: “do not get fleeced by identity theft defense solutions.”

    One important point: Services that tout ID-THEFT “prevention” and “safety” are over-reaching. You are mainly helped by them merely after identity theft has occurred. So, one difficulty is getting a false sense of protection, believing a support can be paid for by you and you’re-done.

    “Normally, the worth of these services will be to alarm you more rapidly,” stated Susan Grant, manager of consumer-protection at the Consumer Federation of America, which has scrutinized ID-THEFT defense solutions in the last few years. “But no ID-THEFT service can legitimately assert to stop your information from being stolen or employed.”

    Specialists say, in case you ‘re curious, know just what you get for your own cash.

    Here are some things to understand about subscribing to identity theft protection services.

    Retail information thefts. Normally, ID-THEFT safety solutions wont aid when card information is stolen from sale terminals in shops.

    With all the news lately about data breaches at major U.S. stores — Target, Neiman-Marcus, Michaels — several buyers might question if they should contribute to an identity theft “defense” support.

    The brief answer is, likely not, if your problem is a robber fraudulently utilizing your payment card information. Commonly, that is not a huge offer, and you may not drop any cash.

    The greatest protection you might have is discovering it by searching for charges that are unknown and tracking the account statements of your card. Do not wait for paper statements, notably after a violation that is known. Review your card transactions on the web.

    Credit checking. This really is frequently an essential part of ID-THEFT defense solutions. Tracking attempts alarm you to your credit reports and to identify deceptive new accounts on them. But again, it does not stop identity theft.

    “Phoning credit-monitoring ‘safety’ is deceptive and only flat wrong,” stated Liz Weston, writer of the publication “Your Credit Rating” and AskLizWeston.com. “Observation does not stop the offense. It might just give you a heads up that it occurred.”

    And Customer Reports warns that “most e-mail and cellular alerts from these providers increase false alarms about routine adjustments in your file. And if fraud is found, you mightn’t be ‘warned’ until days, weeks or months after the truth.”

    How solid is currently tracking? Some services track just one of your three credit reports that are principal. That is of small use. Suppose that a criminal started the lender checks with among the two surveil credit services, and an account in your title?

    You would not understand right away. For instance, the free year of credit-monitoring provided by Target.com after its violation tracks simply your credit report. However, there is no harm in registering for it. In the event you had been a casualty in the Target infraction, visit creditmonitoring.target.com by April 23.

    Free credit-monitoring. Assess your credit reports for fraud your-self at annualcreditreport.com — one report clear of each service annually. Until you curently have an issue, it is a great idea to spread out your credit, assessing one report from every credit reporting bureau every four months.

    CreditKarma.com offers free credit-monitoring through Trans Union, while CreditSesame.com provides free tracking through Experian. And AAA car clubs occasionally offer free credit-monitoring through Experian with their members, Stephens stated. Only beware that some providers that are free will attempt to upsell you on providers and credit pitches that are compensated.

    Other fraud observation. Maybe of greater worth is when an ID-THEFT protection support claims it’ll track commercial databases and public information to locate proof of identity theft. Consumers do not have ready access to these data bases, Grant stated.

    Nevertheless, one firm, All Clear I D (allclearid.com/enroll), provides a “fundamental” free service along these lines, Stephens stated.Shop Online with Caution

    It is a whole lot more wise to take preventative measures that do not cost something, while identity theft prevention services are useful. Many Americans store online but-don’t make an effort to safeguard the data that on the web payment types are entered into by them. Make sure you clear out log-in information and your password on web sites where purchases are made by you. Constantly alter log-in details and your passwords every month or two. Avoid making online purchases on computers that are public as your data obtained by others and may be saved on these devices.

    As an alternative to performing your on-line shopping with your bank’s check card, use your charge card. There are wide-ranging national laws that guarantee the security of compensation and your advice for bogus charges by using a charge card. Those safeguards are a lot more limited by using a check card .

    This trick generates popup windows and junk that resemble forms and web sites in a effort to spur consumers to enter their private information from real banks and companies. This advice is then utilized to obtain the user’s fiscal accounts and make purchases that were wide-ranging. Thus, be sure you’re really on a valid web site with the “s” after the “https” portion of text that precedes the internet address near the highest part of your browser. The “s” signifies that you’re on a protected site where your information will not be stolen.Read Over Your Statements

    Take attempt and the time to analyze bank statements and your credit card. Search for any charges you do not recall making. These should be fairly clear when you will not use money for buys or unless a frequent shopper are you. Look for any costs created at retail merchants which you normally do not regular and retail merchants found outside of your region, if that is true.

    Take a near look at your credit report yearly. The legislation states you may get your credit report free of charge once each year. Your report will be provided by the three credit bureaus. The three credit are Equifax, Experian and Trans Union. It’s possible for you to stay at the top of the contents of your credit report every four months by requesting it from each. Simply use an agency that is distinct every time. Once it is received by you, appear for any charge cards or bank accounts and any bogus charges that yourself has not really started.

    Identity Theft Resources



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  3. Popular Testosterone Supplements - Are They For Real, or Just Hype?

    Wed 11 January 2017

    Testosterone is a steroid hormonal agent that is responsible for boosting the libido and males sperm production. Numerous males complain of declining sex wish. Some medical research studies suggest that the levels of testosterone beginning reducing in guys after the age of 30. Due to low testosterone levels, guys can experience the issues of lack of libido as well as erectile dysfunction. A man with reduced testosterone levels sheds zeal and also energy; this straight affects his sexual wellness and may create anxiety as well as mental stress. For that reason, it becomes crucial for men in their 30s to start having natural testosterone supplements, which function as all-natural hormone and also help individuals lead a healthy life. In order to help you gain back the typical degree of this steroid hormonal agent, nowadays a large range of testosterone supplements are offered in the marketplace. These pills are being popular among men of all ages, as these are made using all-natural ingredients and do not create any adverse effect to the individuals.

    Role of testosterone

    Generated primarily by the testicles, testosterone is the major man sex hormone and also is commonly pertaining to the embodiment of member. It has an important duty to play in the advancement of male reproductive tissues. It is also responsible for producing second sex-related features, consisting of the development of body hair, muscle mass as well as increased bone thickness. Moreover, this steroid hormone is crucial for normal health and wellness and also health. When a male doesn't have appropriate amount of this hormonal agent in the body, it could decrease his capacity to have gratifying sex with reduced libido. In this problem, the very best testosterones supplements could help enhance your testosterone degree boost your sex-related performance.

    Benefits of finest testosterone supplements:

    Enhances sexual life

    The most effective testosterone supplements which include only herbal removes have lots of advantages to the customers. It aids to preserve the normal level of this male sex hormone in the body. This, then, raises the sexual desires as well as makes sure a pleased sex life. With an elevated level of libido, you can delight in a completely satisfied sex-related experience with your companion. An energetic as well as successful sex life is necessary for everyone, since it helps you to be in a happy state of mind, while decreasing your anxiousness and stress degrees.

    Lack of testosterone in the body has a huge effect on the sex-related life of males, as their sex drive decreases and also they not really feel curious about sexes. For staying sexually energetic, they take all-natural testosterone supplements, which enhance vigor as well as energy in the body and also make males sexually energetic. Better sexual life means overall health and wellbeing. With the assistance of these testosterones, guys could prevent many sex-related dysfunctions such as problems related to premature ejaculation, reduced sex drive, inadequate erection, etc

    . If you are detected with low testosterone degrees or have a decreased libido, you can take the very best testosterone supplements to boost your libido along with endurance. In combination with regular exercise as well as healthy and balanced diet plan, you could accomplish better outcomes of these natural supplements.

    Associated Article: Is Megadrox The New Wonder Testosterone Booster?

    Enhances total health

    Along with improving the sexual performance, these supplements can decrease fat and also boost muscular tissue mass as well as toughness. When brought with training and workout, its impacts could be made best use of to a wonderful degree. It additionally improves the bone thickness as well as aids attain the overall well-being.
    Another benefit of testosterone supplements is that it enhances the energy as well as aids a guy lead a healthy life. The Testosterone, being an all-natural steroid aids in developing body, giving more power and power to the body. This power helps guys remain in kind. They can better channelize their power in their work as well as obtain even more fulfillment from exactly what they do.

    Natural testosterone supplements are readily available in various kinds throughout the globe. Though these are readily available at medicine stores, or special on-line pharmacies without prescription, it is, nonetheless, valuable, if one seek advice from a physician prior to beginning taking the dosage of such supplements. Taking these supplements at an early age or taking too much dosage could be dangerous. Whether one is making use of a medication or a lotion, it is vital to check out the guidelines available with the supplements.

    Testosterone supplements work amazingly in boosting the sex desire, assisting to have actually pleased sexual performance. These supplements are made from herbal components and also have no adverse effects.

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